Pseudonym

Shinigami (死神?, “death god” or “death spirit”) is an entity in Japanese folklore that is responsible for seeing that a person dies at their appointed time and then guiding their spirit to be judged in the afterlife. — As defined by Wikipedia

Many people do ask me why saint shinigami.. of all the pen names available, why shinigami? and there’s this one question that retains in my mind that I never answered, why shinigami, you love God right? Now let me answer that..

When I was a lot younger I defined my life as deprived from joy, deprived from freedom.. one who can’t speak her mind, one who can’t expressed joy.. that was the time I choose to be called saint shinigami.. I felt extreme sadness and frustration on things I can’t do for I feel deprived for everything..  Growing up behind that pen name wasn’t easy, it felt so sad and felt so cold.. It seems that I hated the world before it hated me..

To summarize it, I associated myself to death, I considered myself dead.. That is how negative shinigami means to me..

That is what I think how dreadful my life is, that is how blinded I am by the lies of the enemy. Until that day God found me running in circles of misery. I learned how blessed I am, how so much joy I can attain from God’s love.  Life ain’t that bad after all especially when I let God rule over my life.

So what will happen now to saint shinigami?

As much as I wanted to continue to call myself saint shinigami or just shinigami because of its “astig-ness” sound, it won’t fit me anymore. I know how Jesus died for my salvation, for me to live and accept the gift of eternal life.  I don’t want to live my life as if I’m dead, I’m no zombie  but a princess in my God’s eyes. I know how He has set me apart to live a bountiful, happy and blessed life.

But I said to you, “You will possess their land; I will give it to you as an inheritance, a land flowing with milk and honey.” I am the Lord your God, who has set you apart from the nations. – Leviticus 20:24 (NIV)

So long saint shinigami, you no longer live in me, I will no longer hide at your back. I choose to live in faith, with my Father who gave me eternal life.

Hmmm… now what pseudonym will I call myself??hehehe

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About kitine19

im a kid trapped in a woman's body... im a cub and this is the jungle where i play... Jesus is my Lord, His Father is my God... im His disciple and He is my Savior... i write... i dance... i paint... i capture photos... i worship... i pray... i work....
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